Yesterday was Gay Pride Day here in Utah. I imagine Salt Lake’s gay pride festivities are miniscule compared to larger metropolitan areas or even places similar in size, but less conservative than our little valley (which wouldn’t take much). Pride was notable this year in only insofar as this was the first year I marched in the parade instead of just watching it. Well, marched is stretching it a bit. It was more like running interspersed with attempts at dancing.

I swim with QUAC, the local gay and lesbian swim team. Yes, QUAC. It stands for Queer Utah Aquatics Club. The first thing my sister said to me upon hearing the name of my swim team was “Did you just say ‘Queer?’” “Yes,” I sighed. “You know. Quack, duck, water, swimming? UGLAC (Utah Gay and Lesbian Aquatic Club) just doesn’t have the same ring to it, does it?” Anyway, this year the team decided to participate in the parade. Twelve of us learned a little dance routine. The rest were passing out flyers and throwing water on the dancers to keep us from overheating.

I was rather nervous about the whole thing. Not only was this my first time marching in a gay pride parade, I was going to be doing it damn near naked. Eleven of the twelve dancers were in their racing speedos (though in Pricilla’s case, that was a full body racing suit) or in some other tight fitting lycra somethingorother. I was the one hold out. I told them I would dance with them, but there was no way in Hell I was going to do it in a speedo.

Once the parade got going, I didn’t really have time to worry about being in my little swim trunks dancing through downtown Salt Lake City. It was actually a lot of fun. Unfortunately we underestimated the speed of the parade. We assumed there would be other groups doing routines that would keep the parade moving at a sensible pace. Wrong. By the time we had gone through our little routine once, the parade was nearly a block and a half ahead of us. We spent most of the time running to keep up.

No. There are no pictures…at least none in my possession. There was one press guy who followed the team most of the parade route and was snapping pictures every time I noticed him. I am sure there were more than a couple cameras going in the crowd. I had asked a friend to video it for me. Unfortunately we were in catch up mode as we went by where he stood and ended up jogging right past him. I’m sure there’s bound to be photos that end up on the Internet somewhere. It’s up to you to find them, though. ‘Cause if I find ‘em I sure ain’t gonna tell you where they are.