Of Megayachts and Megaegos
There are an estimated 7,000 motor yachts over 80 feet long in use, said Jill Bobrow, editor in chief of ShowBoats International, a yachting magazine. That's up from about 4,000 a decade ago.
Contracts for motor yachts 150 feet and larger increased 15 percent, to 118 from 103, in 2005, according to ShowBoats International. Of those 118, 33 percent are more than 200 feet.
By contrast, there are roughly 440 marinas with berths big enough and water deep enough to accommodate vessels 100 feet or bigger.
Without a spot at the dock, megayacht owners and their passengers are relegated to dropping anchor off the coast and lowering a dinghy to get ashore. But after spending untold millions on a yacht and used to getting the V.I.P. treatment everywhere else they go, most owners prefer not to do so.
Chris McChristian, . . . until recently worked as a pilot on a 107-foot yacht, the Anne-Marie, whose owner Mr. McChristian declined to identify. "If you get there and it's too tight, you'll go to a facility that's not as good or be at anchor somewhere having to commute in by tender. With owners, that's a very awkward position to be in." The megayachters, he added, "like to step on and off the boat."1
Oh, those poor people. My heart goes out to them. What travails and hardships they face.
I'll bet their "dinghy" is a 16' speed boat. Remeber folks a football field is "only" 300 feet. If they spent millions on a yacht you can bet the dinghy it isn't a rubber Zodiac.
You’re either gay or . . .
If you're a man and you sleep in a bed with a dust ruffle and seven pilliows, you're either gay . . .
If you're a man and you've ever been antique shopping during a big football game, you're either gay . . .
If you're a man and you cannot remember the last time you had sex with a woman, you're either gay . . .
Suicide
I just finished my first night of Introduction to Sociology. One of the questions posed by the instructor was, "What minority group has the highest suicide rate?" Well, I know that homosexual sucide rates are pretty high and I couldn't think of another minority who might be higher. The answer he was looking for, however, was Native Americans.
Ah. Yes, I can believe that.
However, being interested in how the numbers stacked up, I got on-line and looked around a bit. Native Americans do have the highest suicide rate of any ethnic group at four times the rate of the general population. 1
Numbers on homosexual suicide seem harder to come by. I suspect that has something to do with a gay man being harder to identify post-humously than say a single, white male over 85. Most studies seem to focus on gay youth and suicide attempts. I found only one page that spoke of gay men attempting suicide at six times the rate of the general population, 1 but since the numbers match those of gay youth studies, it is likely those youth studies that are indicated. One such study of gay youth found attempted suicides at 28.1% among gay youth compared to 4.2% among straight youth. Men were more likely to indicate their sexual orientation as a factor in their attempt than women.2
If I were really interested in proving something here, I'd dig around for more numbers that are actually compareable. This isn't some stupid pissing contest. I was just curious what the numbers looked like. I was surprised by the number pages dedicated to "debunking the gay suicide myth." Apparently early studies were plagued by sample bias. Of course, the conservatives are, I'm sure, still clinging to those early flaws despite the fact that subsequent studies have rectified that problem and still come up with disturbing numbers.3
The largest factor in suicide is something called anomie, a French world that means displaced, or lacking in a sense ones place in society. Normlessness was the word the instructor used. As such it should be no surprise that Native Americans and homosexuals have high suicide rates.
Other miscellaneous facts about suicide:
- Suicide accounts for 1.3% of deaths in the United States, and comes in at #11 for cause of death.
- Suicide outnumbers homicide 5 to 3.
- There are twice as many deaths caused by suicide than caused by AIDS.
- Males are four times as like to commit suicide as females.
- Females are three times as likely to attempt suicide.
- There are an estimated 8-25 attempts for every death.
- The highest rate of any group is white males over 85 at 5.7%.4
2Remafedi, Gary MD, MPH et al., "The Relationship Between Suicide Risk and Sexual Orientation: Results of a Population-Based Study," University of Minnestoa Youth AIDs project, www.yapmn.com
3Remafedi, Gary MD, MPH et al., " Sexual Orientation and Youth Suicide," MSJAMA - Review Vol. 282, pp. 1291-1292, October 6, 1999, www.youth.org.
4"Suicides Completed and Attempted - US 1999", Suicide Reference Library, www.suicidereferencelibrary.com
Oy.
My 11-year old was asking about web pages and how they work last night. "Why, do you want one of your own?"
"I don't know. What is your web page address?"
"Ummmmm...it's a secret."
"Dad! What's your web page address?"
"It's a secret."
"Why is it a secret?"
"Well, because I have something called a blog..."
"What's that?"
"It's like a journal."
"Well, doesn't it have a password or something?"
"No, it doesn't."
"Oh."
To my 11-year old journal = diary = private. I am content to let her continue to think that. Sorry, I am not ready or willing to give my children access to my blog. If they manage to find it on their own, that's another matter and we'll cross that bridge if or when we get there.
I'm not really sure what there is here I am not ready for them to see. It's not like they've never heard me swear. Just ask the same 11-year old about the day I clipped the garbage can backing out of my garage and broke off my side view mirror. I also don't care if they read my political views or some of my meaningless rants. There is the little problem that Dooce and Joe.My.God are not exactly family fare.
I guess my heistation is mostly because of the more personal stuff about me I'm just not convinced they are emotionally mature enough to digest. I have always answered their questions honestly. I figure if they're old enough to ask the question, they're old enough to hear the answer. Had she not interrupted, I would have explained that I write a lot of things here that are really meant for adults and when she was older I would let her read them. I did tell her I was redesigning my photo pages (and moving them to a new URL) and she could see that when I was done.
I'm still not sure how I feel about my girls growing up. On the one hand I look forward to the day when they are adults and we can interact as such, when all things are in the open and on the table for discussion. On the other hand, I still see them as my little girls and I don't want them to grow up . . . ever.
I blame that on my truncated time with them the last six years. Kids change so much between six and twelve. Even though I see my girls more than most divorced dads see their kids, I still only participate in a small fraction of their existence. If I sat down and did the math, I probably have spent a years worth of time with them in the last six years. So as far as I am concerned they are still seven and eight. Eleven and thirteen (practically twelve and fourteen now) be damned.
Brokeback Mountain
Finally saw Brokeback Mountain yesterday. It was the third weekend since it opened at our little independent film house and the theater was packed. D and I were lucky to find a couple seats in the middle instead of sitting against a wall.
It can be hard to be objective about a movie that hits rather close to home and stirs up a whole pile of emotion. While most of the commentary I have seen has been positive, those who have contrary opinions seem to be picking at details. For example, I have issues with the pacing, but I still think Brokeback did a remarkably good job telling the story. On the other hand, no movie that makes me feel like that one does will ever fall into the "I love that movie" category.
I suppose I'm duty bound to offer a spoiler alert at this point. So if you haven't seen the movie or read the story and don't wish to know anymore than you already do about the movie, stop reading here.
Did it make me cry? Yes, but not like many who left the theater with moist eyes. It would not have stopped there for me. I retreated into a safe place about two-thirds of the way through the movie and waited until D and I got back to his place where I sobbed on his shoulder.
Ennis was certainly the hardest for me to watch, for a variety of reasons. Ennis was certainly a reserved man of few words, and seemed to tolerate Jack's exuberance much as animal kingdom parents tolerate the antics of a puppy or cub, but there was more to Ennis that only found expression when Jack was around. There was his sense of humor that was not in evidence anywhere else. He talked to Jack like he talked to no one else. Upon their first reunion was it Ennis or Jack who pinned the other to the wall? None of these things could find expression anywhere else in Ennis' life, tied as they were to a love that was forbidden, not even for his girls for whom he seemed to have genuine affection.
I spent much of my life exactly like that, just without the "couple of high altitude fucks a year." There was a time when my ex-wife believed I was a Jack. When my one little affair that I did have ended, she seemed to believe it was because I had failed to convince the other guy to run away with me. The truth is, I ended it because a wife, children and a white picket fence was the world I wanted to live in. A dual life was not an option for me. Like Jack, I would not have been satisfied with that arrangement. I had to pick one or the other, and having picked one did my best to not even contemplate the other, something I generally failed at. When my wife left me, I spent the better part of a year convinced Ennis' fate would be mine: to grow old alone, unfulfilled, poor and living in some crappy apartment somewhere. I knew that I would never marry again.
Having been there, I tend to empathize all too well with the Ennises out there: those unfulfilled and unhappy, those whose potential for love and passion (which is different from lust) goes largely unrealized. This isn't the 1960s, but there are still far too many such men out there. Nor is Jack's fate is a thing of the past. Even here in "God's Country" people still seem to believe that killing a faggot is a service to society. At least it's getting harder to get away with it.
Brokeback Mountain is also just one story. It doesn't tell the story of men like the roommate of a guy I dated a for a while, who, shortly after T. and I stopped pursuing romance together, put a plastic bag over his head rather than face explaining to his family why he never brought a nice girl home for Sunday dinner or why he wasn't going to be get married in the forseeable future. As far as I know, his family still has no idea what led their son to take his own life.
Still, even amidst the sorrow stories like Brokeback stirs in me, there was something else in there as well. At one point in my marriage, when my wife and I were trying to figure things out, she said to me, "You just don't want to be happy."
"Yes, I do," I said in an uncharacteristic moment of complete candor. "I just don't believe I deserve to be happy."
Even though there is plenty of time yet, Ennis' fate does not seem to be mine. I have known more happiness in the last few years than I thought I would ever find out of life, and right now I am sharing an amazing love with a truly wonderful man. That belief of mine having had over 30 years to ingrain itself in me, it still baffles me and I constantly ask myself what I've done to deserve the good life that I have.
To whatever higher power is out there, thank you.
H is for dipsHit
Some of you may know Larry H. Miller as the owner of the Utah Jazz. Those of you not living in Utah may not know that he is one of the wealthiest men in Utah. In addition to the Jazz, Mr. Miller owns half a dozen large car lots, untold real estate, and a chain of movie theaters. There's the Megaplex 12, the Megaplex 17 and the recently acquired (and renamed) Megaplex 8.
Several weeks ago while checking out movie times I was pleasantly surprised to see Brokeback Mountain advertised as "Coming Soon" on the Megaplex 17 web site. "Wow," I thought. "Utah might actually be moving up in the world." I was a little confused to be back on the Megaplex site a day or two later and unable to find any mention of Brokeback Mountain whatsoever. Perhaps I had been mistaken. This is Utah after all.
Well, last night at a party I learned I had not been mistaken. Brokeback had indeed been slated to open at the Megaplex, but Larry pulled it. Not terribly surprising, but it gets better. Apparently after the movie opened at the local independent film house and was filling up the theater (the first two days sold out before the show opened), our friend Larry changed his mind and decided to screen the movie after all. However, the conscience of this fine, upstanding Mormon got the better of him and he pulled the movie again, an hour before show time. Rumor is the show was sold out. Whether or not that is true, people showed up to see the movie only to be sent home with apologies.
So let me get this "straight." Two men struggling with their love for each other in a world where such love is forbidden (and still looked down on) is unacceptable for Mr. Mormon. On the hand, movies like this are no problem.
Nice. Care to rationalize that for us, Mr. Miller?
UPDATE:
Just so you know this wasn't mere party gossip, the Associated Press ran a story this morning.
Gayle Ruzicka, president of the conservative Utah Eagle Forum, said not showing the film set an example for the people of Utah.
"I just think (pulling the show) tells the young people especially that maybe there is something wrong with this show," she said.1
Calling the Eagle Forum conservative is like calling Pat Robertson out of touch with reality. "Maybe" there's something wrong with this movie? There is something definately f***ed up about The Hostel, but you don't see Gayle getting her panties in a wad about that one.
Gotta love conservatives and their myopic obsession with gay sex.
What comes around goes around.
A judge in Italy has ordered a priest to appear in court and prove the existence of Jesus Christ. This is apparently the result of a law suit filed by a man with a stick up his butt.1
I suppose after centuries under the heavy hand of Rome, there is bound to be some push back now that the Vatican doesn't wield quite the secular authority it once did, but this is beyond stupid.
Since when has anyone been required to defend their religious beliefs in a court of law? The man with the rectal obstruction is apparently upset that the priest in question denounced his views in a parish newsletter. It is true. Parish newsletters do wield an incredible amount of influence over the masses.
The charge is "abuse of popular credulity," which is apparently a criminal offense in Italy and was probably intended to catch scam artists. I'm pretty sure in never entered the minds of the original framers of the law that anyone would ever turn it against the Catholic Church.
Why don't we just carry this to its logical conclusion and start eviction proceedings against the Vatican? Wait. It's its own country. I guess Italians will just have to go to war.
I suppose turn about is fair play. After centuries of Christians using the rule of law to enforce their world view, I guess it's fitting that the tables are finally turned, but I have concerns about where this will lead. The pendulum will simply swing the other way and we'll live in a world oppressed by intelligentsia. Do we really want to live in a place where faith and belief are criminal acts? Do we want to live in a place where all speech and thought is run through a PC filter and only appropriate and approved utterances are free of civil penalty? Is Italy turning into Oceania? Are we next? Is this really some people's idea of freedom?
You know what they say: Be careful what you ask for. You may get it.